dear network executives and ad buyers,

listen. i'm a city girl, and i go out a lot, and i use the awesome DVR. but sometimes i'm home watching TV like any other american.

but i'm not any other american. i'm a working woman of color living in new york. and you need to stop selling me things i have no interest in. are we not living in the future? isn't everyone all about direct marketing?

let me help you help me help myself.

here are the commercials i DO NOT want to see:

- asthma medication commercials

- aarp commercials (screw old people and the social security i'm not getting)

- heartburn medication commercials

- valtrex commercials

- viagra/cialis commercials (please. no more. please.)

- laundry detergent commercials (yawn.)

- car commercials. unless they're in black and white and very stylish with good music so that i almost forget it's a car commercial. (yes, talking to you, jaguar)

- commercials in which a man gives a woman DIAMONDS*

- commericals in which a man gives a woman DIAMONDS but the commercial is really for a credit card (mr suki, akiko, brian - talking to you)*

- commercials for "restaurants" that, because i live in a city with amazing food, i will never ever go to: applebee's, chili's, quizno's.... i would also ban olive garden commericals but my high school boyfriend is in one of them so i won't.


there may be more, i'll keep you updated.

sincerely,
me



*i'm just too jaded right now

how to have a good tuesday night

how to have a good tuesday night in girlhattan:

1. go directly from work to barrio chino
2. have friends waiting at the bar, smiling
3. be seated, immediately order fresh lime margarita
4. order: tacos arrechera, sincronizada especial ("what's cuitlacoche?""a fungus." "it's delicious!"), enchiladas de mole, and "the sampler"
4. discuss: banana bungalows in hollywood, the death of the maori queen, all you really know about immigration issues
5. have another drink
6. "after my foot surgery, they gave me vicodin..."
"vicodin is *really* good for pain."
"vicodin is really good for everything."
7. have another drink
8. walk across the street to babycakes, gaze at the delicious, "healthy" low-sugar and vegan desserts.
9. walk out of babycakes, around the corner, down the street and to the right until you reach sugar sweet sunshine, where the cupcakes are full of butter and sugar as god intended
10. eat a cupcake
11. run into tommy while on sugar high
12. go home and IM crush something saucy ("but i've had two margaritas and a cupcake, so i'm just talking crazy.")
13. gossip on the phone til 1am
14. go to sleep