no, non, nay, nyet, ixnay, etc.

so i'm standing in the stairwell of the F train station, finishing up a call on my cell. i'm wearing white pants and a mango-colored top. sunny, demure.

this middle-aged asian guy stops next to me on the stairs and smiles.

i smile back as i'm hanging up the phone. clearly he's soft in the head or something.

"hi," he says.

i'm walking down the stairs. "hi," i say. inside i add, freak.

"you? two? you? two?" he asks.

"um - you need two dollars? you need a metrocard?"

it's a sunny day, i'm feeling generous. i will swipe the crazy man so he can ride the F.

but as i swipe, go through the turnstile and wave my metrocard at him, he whips out his own metrocard and follows me through.

"two hundred," he says. "you, two hundred?"

"excuse me?" i walk a little faster.

he comes really close to me and shows me a wad of cash.

"you, me, two hundred dollar?"

it is five pm on a sunday and i am being PROPOSITIONED FOR PROSTITUTION???

"no!" i say, waving him away.

he seems incredulous. "no?"

"NO!" i walk away briskly.

and that, friends, is how hot it is in girlhattan. people are losing their minds.


i really needed this.